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22 Intimacy with God: The Heart of it All

Copyright © 2023 Michael A. Brown
‘He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.’ (Ps. 91:1 AV)
‘Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.’ (Deut. 6:5)
     TO have a place where we can meet regularly with God in the intimacy of our soul with his Spirit, is the thing which God himself yearns for and desires above all other things.  It is for just such intimacy with him that we were created in the beginning.  When God created the first couple, he would walk in the garden in the cool of the day seeking to be with them, to walk and talk with them (Gen. 3:8).  This desire of his for a place and time of quiet, loving intimacy with us is also reflected in the great commandment above: ‘Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.’ (Deut. 6:5).
     God is love and he is deeply loving (1 John 4:8,16), and so his desire, above all other things, is for a close, loving relationship with us.  And, of course, it was precisely to reconcile and restore us into such a close, loving relationship with God that Jesus died on the cross and rose again.  So our first and primary call as God’s children is to live in close, loving fellowship with Jesus:
‘God… has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord…’ (1 Cor. 1:9)
      God delights in believers who desire to nurture and develop a life of consistent intimacy with him.  He yearns to have us for himself, because it is for this that we were both created and redeemed, and he delights when he finds in us a real hunger and yearning to seek fellowship with him in the secret place:
‘Or do ye think that the Scripture saith in vain, “The Spirit that He placed in us jealously desireth us for his own?”’ (Jas. 4:5 Alford)
‘My heart says of you, “Seek his face!” Your face, LORD, will I seek.’ (Ps. 27:8)
      However, our very human tendency to be busy or constantly occupied, as the Ephesian believers seem to have been, and our carnal human desires for the things of life and this world which cause us to share our affection for God with the things of the world, lead us away from intimacy with God, causing our hearts to grow cold towards him and leaving us in danger of forfeiting his blessing upon us:
‘Do not love the world or anything in the world.  If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.’ (1 John 2:15)
‘I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance…  Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love…  Repent and do the things you did at first.  If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.’ (Rev. 2:2,4-5)
     Our natural human orientation towards work and activity, which causes us so often to not value as we should the relationships we have with those around us, inevitably results in loss of intimacy and closeness with them, so these relationships slowly but surely become distant, dry and cold.  It is much the same with God: we lose our place of intimacy with him or simply fail to nurture it at all, when we focus ourselves and the meaning of our lives on activities and busyness or on the things of this world.
     The consequence of this lack of intimacy with God is, of course, utterly predictable, and, if we are honest with ourselves, we all know it so well: we dry up spiritually, and our churches and work for God also then become dry and lifeless, lacking his tangible presence and power.  Ultimately our choice is simple: either we learn to nurture and develop consistent intimacy with God in our spiritual life, or we continue in our endless busyness and/or the carnality of our love for the things of the world, and thereby lose out on what we could potentially have in and through a close walk with God.
     For any marriage relationship to fulfil its God-given meaning, of being one in spirit with our spouse, there has to be a time and place of regular intimacy where the couple draw aside and are alone together, away from everything and everyone else.  This is the place where, figuratively speaking, the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign is on the door.
     No marriage relationship can ever be stronger than its place of intimacy.  This is the real heart of it all, where the relationship is made or begins to break down; where problems and issues are faced, talked through and resolved; where forgiveness is sought and given; where affection, love and commitment are renewed and restored; where deep and free joy is renewed through the expression of love; where the tenderest affections are expressed and two hearts are warmed again; where quality time together brings strength to each other and to the union of two souls in one; where real heart communication takes place – one speaks and knows that the other is truly hearing – where heart touches heart; where covenant vows are honoured, and out of which fruitfulness is created.
     Without such a place of regular intimacy, there can be no marriage in its fullest meaning.  There may be a dry, empty shell involving the lives of two people which may still look very much to outsiders like a marriage, but it is not the real thing as God intended it to be and to become.  And if they are honest, the two partners themselves know this deep down within…  If a couple is to nurture a healthy and strong marriage it all boils down to this: the willingness on the part of each to meet regularly in committed, quality time with the other to build up, strengthen and develop what has been created between them:
‘My lover spoke and said to me, “Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me…”  “Arise, come, my darling; my beautiful one, come with me.”’ (Song 2:10,13)
‘My lover is mine and I am his.’ (Song 2:16, 5:3)
‘…when I found the one my heart loves, I held him and would not let him go…’ (Song 3:4)
‘I belong to my lover, and his desire is for me.  Come, my lover, let us go to the countryside, let us spend the night in the villages.’
(Song 7:10-11)
‘His left arm is under my head and his right arm embraces me.’ (Song 7:3)
     Experience in a marital relationship teaches us that, whatever else we need to do with our time in terms of work and activities in the regular course of daily life, if our marriage is to survive, last the course and continue to be blessed and fruitful without drying up and dying off from within, then regular quality times for the renewal of intimacy with our spouse have to be given a place of priority.  This really is more important than anything else we have or do in life.
     A marriage in which two souls are bound together as one in organic, inner heart union, and which is healthy and happy, is invariably characterised by regular times of close intimacy between the couple and by a commitment to each other to maintaining this intimacy as the years go by.  Such a relationship is blessed and fruitful, and fulfils God’s intention for it.  It is also invariably a blessing and encouragement to the many other people who know the couple and have opportunity to regularly observe their relationship.
     All of this is also true of our covenant relationship with God in which we have been drawn into an inner union of spirit with the presence and life of God through the Holy Spirit who dwells within us (1 Cor. 6:17,19).  To have been indwelled by the Holy Spirit, is to have been indwelled by the Spirit of love for God.  So yearning, love and affection for God are birthed within us by the Holy Spirit, causing us to want to seek God and to hunger and thirst for his word and presence:
‘As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God.  My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.  When can I go and meet God?’ (Ps. 42:1-2)
O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you…’ (Ps. 63:1)
‘My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the LORD; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God.’ (Ps. 84:2)
      The Holy Spirit within us will always want to draw us aside regularly into a place of quiet intimacy with God, so that we share in fellowship with the Father and the Son (1 John 1:3).  Intimacy with God is the heart of all true devotion, and he longs that we learn to cultivate such closeness with him.  If we draw near to God, he always responds by drawing near to us (Jas. 4:8).  The seeking of a quiet place of solitude, together with the appropriate confession of any sin and failure in our lives, allows us to draw close to God and to enter into his loving presence.
      An old Scottish preacher expressed it this way:
‘Be much alone with God.  Do not put Him off with a quarter of an hour morning and evening.  Take time to get thoroughly acquainted.  Talk everything over with Him.  Pour out every wish, thought, plan, and doubt to Him.  He wants converse with His creatures.  Shall His creatures not want converse with Him?  He wants, not merely to be on “good terms” with you, if one may use man’s phrase, but to be intimate.  Shall you decline the intimacy and be satisfied with mere acquaintance?  What!  Intimate with the world, with friends, with neighbours, but not with God?  That would look ill indeed.  Folly, to prefer the clay to the potter, the marble to the sculptor, this little earth and its lesser creatures to the mighty Maker of the universe, the great “All and in all.”’[1]
      The heart of developing intimacy with God is knowing that it is a relationship based on mutual love.  God is love, and he wants us to be assured of his love for us; there is no fear in this love (cf. 1 John 4:18).  He loves us deeply and we love him back.  We will always seek to be with someone that we love.  Our heart yearns and longs for them, and moves us to seek them out.  When our love for God is strong and warm, the carnal things of the world lose the grip and power of their attraction.  We want him more than we want them.  So we seek him out and we stay and linger in his presence, simply because we want him and want to be with him.  We are alive unto God.  We sit with him, talk with him and walk with him.  We enjoy him (cf. John 15:9-11).
      All true worship and adoration of God is simply an expression of deep heart love and affection for him.  Expressing this love for God to him in praise, blessing, adoration, thanksgiving and worship (and especially by praying in the spirit and singing in tongues) causes the Holy Spirit within us to respond: he warms our heart and envelopes us through and through with his presence (Eph. 5:18-20).  The stresses of the day melt away and the internal voices and noises of our own soul, caused by daily living, are quietened and stilled, bringing us into a place of deep peace and free joy in God’s presence.
      It is in this place that our heart is cleansed through confession and our spiritual strength is refreshed and renewed.  We whisper our love to God and are assured in return of his love for us.  We can open up and pour out our hearts to him, telling him our innermost thoughts and concerns.  As we become vulnerable before him in his presence, we can receive healing for any inner wounds we are carrying.  As we relax in his presence and focus on being with him, we become close enough to him to sense his inner promptings and to hear the whispers of the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit speaking to us.  We surrender ourselves into submission and obedience to his word and will (John 14:23).  We can pray, cry out and intercede for the needs and situations of other people (cf. Rom. 8:26-27).  As we read and meditate on the Scriptures, they come alive and the Lord speaks to us through them, satisfying our souls, strengthening our faith, and giving us revelation and deeper understanding: ‘The LORD confides in those who fear him; he makes his covenant known to them.’ (Ps. 25:14).
      When we emerge from our time spent with God we are spiritually refreshed and have peace in our hearts.  We feel deeply blessed.  There is a radiance, a glow, an inner beauty, a spiritual lightness, peace and calmness, a sensitivity and a warmth of love both for God and for people that grows within us as we consistently meet with God in this way.  Spending time in intimacy with God satisfies the deepest yearnings and needs of our heart to know and be known.  The joy and peace of true love for God in our lives can often be tangibly seen, sensed or felt by others, and it has a winsome attractiveness about it.  Others see or sense the presence of Christ and his love in us, and this presence can then overflow and minister to others through us.
      Learning to regularly maintain such a time and place of intimacy with God keeps our relationship with him warm and close, and our spiritual life therefore remains fresh, free and peaceful, and it takes striving out of our lives and ministry.  Returning frequently to this same place of soul intimacy where we have met with God before is the key to maintaining intimacy with him and it keeps us in touch with his living presence.  We keep ourselves in the love of God (Jude v.21).  In doing this our hearts are filled again and again to overflowing with love and praise for God, and it keeps us consistently in that place of inner stillness and peace that God desires should characterise our lives.
Effective and fruitful ministry comes out of a life lived in intimacy with God
      Although a measure of study, activity, organization and management is always necessary to our success in God’s work and to preserving its fruitfulness, yet Jesus stated an axiomatic truth of spiritual life when he said that our fruitfulness in the kingdom of God depends in the first place on consistent intimacy in our relationship with him, much as the branch depends on the life-giving sap of the vine to bear fruit:
‘I am the vine; you are the branches.  If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.’ (John 15:5)
      Success and fruitfulness in our work in the kingdom of God – whatever our particular call, role or activity may be – flows out of consistent and committed intimacy with him.  It cannot be separated from this.  We cannot afford to pay lip-service to the concept of intimacy with God, while depending on our skills and talents to accomplish the work of God for him; it simply does not work.  All that results is sterile, barren, powerless, spiritually lifeless and ultimately fruitless activity.  And don’t we know it?!
      The heart of a life of ministry has to be intimacy with God in the first place, not our activities for him.  Intimacy with God which gives birth to inner vision for his work and then leads us into activity for his kingdom will inevitably be blessed and bear much fruit.  This is the way in which it worked for the early apostles.  The Holy Spirit was able to communicate to them vision for his work when they were spending quality time together in his presence, worshipping and fasting:
‘While they were worshipping and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.”’ (Acts 13:2)
      It is the nurturing of consistent intimacy behind the scenes which leads to having the presence, blessing and power of God in worship and ministry in public meetings.  These do not come simply through music, through spiritual entertainment or trying to work things up; they come through a life of consistent intimacy with God.  A man or woman, who consistently spends daily times in intimacy with God during the week, will inevitably carry his presence with them when they come to the pulpit or stage on Sunday.  And the opposite is also true: if we do not spend much time in intimacy with God during the week, then we will not experience very much of his presence and blessing with us in our Sunday meetings, no matter how well we may have prepared for this in other ways.
      We cannot work up the presence of God.  It is something we carry with us because we have been with him, and so we bring it with us when we come to church or when we minister to people.  Just as the life-giving sap of the vine flows into the branch, it is the person who dwells regularly in God’s presence, who then carries his presence with him/her when they emerge from their time with God, just as Moses experienced (cf. Ex. 34:29-35).
      Every servant of God who wants to be used significantly and fruitfully by him in ministry has to learn this lesson of regular and committed intimacy with God.  Indeed, growth into maturity in our walk with God is characterised by a deepening desire for a closer and more consistent intimacy with him.  It is a foundational axiom of spiritual life, proven countless times over by servants of God through the ages, that all effective and fruitful ministry comes out of a life lived in intimacy with God.
      Intimacy with God is something that can be gained or lost every day.  It is those who want the presence of God so much that they are prepared to lay aside anything that hinders their intimacy with him in order to give themselves fully to it, who are the ones who find him and walk consistently close to him, carrying his presence with them.[2]
      Joshua seems to have learned this as a young man by observing Moses.  As Moses’ servant, he would accompany him to the Tent of Meeting where Moses met and talked with God.  However, when Moses left the tent to return to the camp, Scripture tells us that Joshua did not leave the tent:
‘Then Moses would return to the camp, but his young aide Joshua son of Nun did not leave the tent.’ (Ex. 33:11)
      Joshua had joined the dots up.  He had made the connection between the fact that Moses could discern God’s voice so clearly and that his presence and power were with Moses, and the fact that Moses spent time regularly in intimacy with God in prayer in the Tent of Meeting.  So what did Joshua do?  He imitated Moses and began his own personal habit of spending time lingering in the presence of God, so that he too could learn to experience intimacy with God in the same way.  He coveted the presence and power of God, saying to himself: “I want this too!”  So is it any wonder then that, when his own time eventually came to lead the community of God’s people, he too could discern the voice of God to him and guide God’s people aright?  And where did he learn it?  From being consistently in intimacy with God!
      Look at David, spending so many occasions in praise and worship, arising with the dawn to spend time with God (Ps. 57:8, 63:1).  Why did he do it?  Because, despite his weaknesses and failures, he loved God supremely above all things.  It was love of God’s presence and the adoration that flows from love for God that drew him aside so often with his harp.  And the fruit of this is that we are all so blessed even today by his psalms.
      And what of Anna, that old woman in her eighties who regularly prayed night and day, worshipping and fasting?  How on earth did she do it?  In one sense, it was very simple: she had committed and consecrated herself to nurturing and developing a close and intimate relationship with God ever since her husband died many years earlier, and, out of her consistently growing deep love for God’s presence, she drew aside regularly to be with him until she scarcely wanted to do anything else anymore!  And God saw this surrender and deep desire on her part to love him and to be with him, and developed in her a prophetic ministry.  Her prophetic ministry was birthed in and came out of her consistent intimacy with God (Luke 2:36-38).
      So, if we want our own lives to be a blessing to others and to bear fruit for the kingdom of God, it would be profitable for us to observe and imitate the lives and practices of our forebears, just as Joshua did (Heb. 13:7).  As the above examples indicate, the great men and women of the faith, who walked in the presence and power of God, were all people who loved God supremely and coveted his presence above all other things.  Love for God in them had displaced carnal and worldly affections in their lives.  The yearning and delight of their hearts to be with God compelled them inwardly to seek his face, so they developed the habit of re-visiting their place of intimacy with him on a regular basis several times every day (and often during the night also).  In this sense they devoted themselves to living in a spirit of prayer, praying continually (Col. 4:2, 1 Thess. 5:17).  They determined that they would stay consistently near God.
      So Adoniram Judson held himself to set times during both day and night when he would spend a short time with God.[3]  Both Rees Howells and his son Samuel never went a day without spending several significant times with God.  When we reflect on the anecdote that Smith Wigglesworth never prayed for more than twenty minutes, but never let twenty minutes go by without praying, it should be clear to us that what he was doing was guarding his place of soul intimacy with God by not allowing himself to get far from it.  He was making sure that he stayed very near to God, and he consistently maintained this nearness to God throughout the latter years of his life in ministry.
      Furthermore, like these men and women of God, it is through being regularly in this place of intimacy with God that we are then consistently able to minister effectively to other people out of the freshness and power of God’s presence.  If, as Joshua did, we have understood what the fruits are of living in intimacy with God, in terms of his presence and power being with us, then we will no doubt value and covet such intimacy above all other things in life.
      We will become men and women who are able to discern and know when God is speaking to us.  His presence will be with us tangibly and will create followership in those around us.  We will become sensitive to the Holy Spirit and will learn how to walk and flow in his presence, power and charismatic operations.  We will receive words of knowledge and prophetic words for people as our minds become attuned to the mind of Christ.  God will be able to demonstrate his healing power through us as his love and compassion for people fill our own hearts.  We will be able to lead God’s people into his presence in times of free worship.  There will be a flow from us of life-giving virtue to other people as we preach and lay hands on people, and so on.
      It was written of John Hyde’s habits at the annual Sialkot conventions, that ‘he felt that his place was in the prayer room, but he had to enter the platform at times, and his messages were delivered with tremendous power, as we would naturally expect when he came straight from the prayer room to deliver his message.’[4]  Hyde would be soaked in the presence of God, having spent hours in praise and intercession in the prayer room, and would carry this presence and power with him straight into the pulpit.  On these occasions, he would allow no intervening time in which the presence and power of God could dissipate from him by engaging himself with ordinary, mundane matters.  He went straight from praying, to preaching!  Is it any wonder then that his messages were so powerful and changed the lives of so many people?
      Such regular times that we spend in prayer, worship and/or the word of God do not necessarily have to be long.  They may simply be short, quality times that we spend with God.  But they are sufficient to keep the fire of our inner spiritual passion stoked, our hearts warm with love for God, and our minds fresh in his word.
      Coming aside several times every day for short periods in this way enables us to abide consistently in a place where we are walking in the inward grace, freedom, peace and joy of the Lord.  We remain fresh and ready to minister to people whenever we need to, out of this inner grace and peace.  Similarly, we are consistently able to respond appropriately to daily issues and challenges, out of this inward grace and peace.
      In determining to maintain such a time and place with God and thereby keep our relationship with him warm, passionate and loving, we will not stray far from him, despite what we may have to be doing or engaging with in the meantime in daily life or work.  We will never be far from the Lord, and our hearts will not grow so cold that it takes a long time and a lot of confession of failure on our part to get back to that place of soul intimacy.  It will only take a short time to enter that place of freshness and heart warmth once again.  A joyful smile and the sound of praise and love for God will never be far from our lips!
“‘I will bring him near and he will come close to me, for who is he who will devote himself to be close to me?” declares the Lord.’ (Jer. 30:21)





[1] Bonar, H. Follow the Lamb, 1861.
[2] Joyner, R. The Final Quest, Charlotte: Whitaker House, 1996, p.140-141.
[3] Bounds, E.M. Power Through Prayer, Whitaker House: Springdale, 1982, p.48-49.
[4] Carré, E.G. (Ed.), Praying Hyde, South Plainfield: Bridge Publishing, 1982, pp.93-94.

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